Answers for Involved Parents

1. How should I deal with unfriendly school employees?

Your job is to make the school want to help your child. School employees are less likely to want to help you if you blame them, write complaint letters against them, or threaten them with lawsuits. Attend NCCARE trainings to learn tactics and strategies for effective advocacy.

  • Be polite but firm. Remember that you have a right to be heard and your opinions and needs be considered when decisions are being made.
  • Do not give up. You may have to repeat your request several times. 
  • Document your objections. If you are not satisfied, write a detailed letter.
  • Be factual, not emotional. Do not attack people.

2. How Do I Negotiate with My Child’s School?

A willingness to negotiate will save you a great deal of time and can help you avoid a hearing. These techniques will be helpful.

  • Listen carefully. Listening to the other side will give you a good idea about potential solutions. 
  • Don’t get offended. Remember that you are there to advocate for your child, not argue. Ask questions. You are after information about your child, so ask if you don’t completely understand something.
  •  Find alternatives. Be prepared if your negotiation fails to get the results you want by figuring out a different course of action.

Rules for Negotiation

  • Organize your records

  • Outline your complaints

  • Provide evidence on the issues

  • Know what you want

  • Make specific requests.

3. What if the school suddenly calls an IEP team meeting?

Attend the meeting, but let them know that you do not know why they have asked for the meeting. Then, ask that they reschedule for another date so you can prepare yourself for the meeting. Take time to figure out your plan and respond in writing.

  • Don’t agree to anything at the meeting. 
  • Find out what they want and respond in writing. If teachers complain about behavior that is related to your child’s disability, request that the school look at:
    • the program (IEP) and the goals (increased services) 
    • Accommodations 
    •  Placement
    •  Staff training

Make sure you participate in writing your child’s future IEPs. If you are aware of what the IEP says, you will know where it needs more information. The more information you can provide in your child’s IEP, the easier it is for everyone to understand your child’s disability.

4. How Do I Prepare for a Hearing?

A complaint triggers a due process hearing. At the hearing, you should present your case in an organized and factual manner. You do not need to argue like a lawyer. It is best if you present your case as a reasonable parent who is advocating for the rights of your child.

  •  Keep organized records
  •  Make short, clear statements about your complaint 
  •  Explain what you want 
  •  Give facts that support your complaint 
  •  Be specific to your set of facts 
  •  Find supporting evidence 
  •  Be convincing

If you present your case in an organized way, but the decision is not in your favor, you are still in a position to prove that the decision was wrong or unfair. A well-planned case, calm attitude and firm goals are all you need to be a great advocate for your child! If you have questions or need assistance, please contact NCCARE at 919-861-2064